Being in a relationship is not just about love. It’s like an experiment wherein you two are trying to dissect each other. Every action, behaviour, beauty and family are always part of the dissection. Knowing every little thing about yourselves. Doing the trial and error, you fight and love each other. It’s a bumpy and fun road trip.
There’s a psychological research for having a healthy and happy relationships. In fact, some of the principles are opposite with the traditionally considered sweet or in a normal relationship. You may want to take a moment to read the six toxic habits in a relationship.
- Scored card
It’s counting or blaming each other for past mistakes you made in a relationship. The relationship scorecard is toxic because you’re not living in a moment of mistake you have right now. Past is past and what’s present is the moment you have to deal with. You don’t need to carry all the old stuff in the past, you’re not going to fill your bag with bad memories, you have to fill your bag with the good ones and share it with your partner. Throw away the trash; your bag is not a Doraemon’s pocket.
- Giving Hints
It is when you want something but you keep on giving hint to your partner for him/her to realize you’re mad. Passive-aggressive is letting your partner pull the trigger to be mad at you as well. He/she is not a fortune teller. Tell him what’s wrong. State your feelings both verbally and vocally.
- Holding a Hostage
This happens when one person complaints and emotional blackmailing the other person. Threatening your partner wouldn’t do any good in your relationship. Accept every good and bad sides of the other person. Criticism is normal in a relationship, be comfortable with it.
- Don’t Expect
It’s when you’re having a bad day and the other person isn’t that supportive about your emotion so you blame him for his action. That’s too selfish. Don’t expect him to be like you. Don’t be too dependent as well to your partner, sometimes you need to grow and face the harsh reality of life.
- Over Jealousy
This happens when the other person is too jealous to the other person whenever he talks, texts, and touches or hangs outs in the general area. It goes beyond the limit of a relationship where the other person hack on his partner’s email, Facebook account or even read private text messages. I know this generation isn’t that safe anymore because they love playing love games. But if you are in a right person, you trust him because you know him.
- Buying to Solve a Problem
Money can’t buy us happiness, even solving the solution to your relationship problem. Material things are just spices in your relationship. Don’t give him a thing if you know what he really needs. Communicate!